Mary Gygax

I first met and became friends with Mary Gygax.

Mary, a Jehovah's Witness, often came knocking, spreading the Word around Lake Geneva. We had recently moved there, so she was among the first individuals I encountered. I was only 9, but I enjoyed our fairly regular talks about religion standing in our foyer.

For the record, I'm an atheist and have been since my parents gave me the choice, so before 7 I did not believe in God. However, my mind remained uncertain about the existence of a spiritual realm. So Mary doesn't remember that I was an atheist then, which makes sense. I hadn't yet learned to represent it strongly because I hadn't yet understood the social issues.

Nonetheless, ever since meeting Mary this way, I've advocated holding door-to-door conversations about almost any topic. Signage can easily indicate the resident's preferences on these matters. And in today's siloed world, face-to-face conversation would promote greater civility, at minimum.

My first Gen Con was 1972.

We lived at 1003 Main St., across the street from the lake and library park where Gary's memorial is to be placed, so there was a lot of foot traffic in front of our house. Among those walkers, I met a couple of 1920s flappers, one of whom danced for Al Capone before the feds raided his mansion on the lake. And I also met Edith Rogers, a short, kind, black-haired lady in her 60s, most recognizable at a distance by her long white London Fog overcoat.

I accompanied Edith on her walks, listening as she recounted the town’s history and chatting about various topics, until she mentioned that I reminded her of a young man she wanted me to meet named Ernie Gygax. So she took me down to Horticultural Hall and introduced me to the Gygaxes at Gen Con 5.

As mentioned, I already knew Mary, so Edith was our mutual friend. And when she introduced us, Gary and Mary, holding an around 1-year-old Luke in her arms, and Ernie were standing in the stables area. We all chatted cordially for a bit until Gary had to run off, being so busy with the Con. But I'd gotten into the con for free, and I found someone to play Avalon Hill's Gettysburg with for the rest of the afternoon, which was a game I knew from playing with my dad.

I never really hit it off with Ernie because he was 4 years older and in junior high, and I was in 4th grade, which is a giant gap at that age. I did meet him again a year or two later.

1003 Main St. was a 3-story Victorian cut up into 4 apartments. Above us on the second floor, Hilton and Vicki Byrd sculpted brass for a living. I'd hang out in their studio watching them sculpt for hours. Eventually they hired Ernie to polish their finished works. According to Hilton, Gary felt Ernie needed to learn a work ethic.

At the time, creating games wasn't thought of as work, but as something more likely done by lazy, childish people.

Gary's value in work should historically be noted, given his monetization of what we now call the gaming industry.

Sadly, coping with an immense amount of pain, Edith put on several layers of coats and jumped off the bridge closest to the Riviera, drowning, far too soon after we met.